48 and freer than ever

4.8 reasons to feel bloody fantastic about getting older

Reason 1

Saturday was a blast. It was my 48th birthday.

I bounced out of bed to meet a gaggle of sober mates for coffee. We reminisced about the old days…meaning the days before we were sober (we didn’t know each other then).

There were the ‘oh wow, yes, I remember that’ kind of fun stories.

There were the ‘oof me too’ stories that make you nod your head in empathy (with a slight cringe).

Then there were the full-body shudder stories we physically remembered as our visceral memory kicked in and took us right back to the horrible aftermath of the worst hangovers, walks of shame, and impending anxiety and depression.

It’s a blessing to look back at the woman I used to be with self-love. Knowing she both had a great time, and the worst of times, and that nowadays she’s level-headed and that half-measures are fun! Life doesn’t have to be lived at extremes to feel good. That’s reason 1 of the 4.8 reasons I have to feel fabulous. Sobriety.

I have been sober for the entirety of my 40s. It was 3 months before my 40th that I said, “I am not going into my 4th decade of life behaving and feeling like this!” I was totally sick of myself. Acting like I was 21 on the weekends, juggling a career, a charity, and my trauma.

I bought a new pair of big girl pants and started the journey of taking a good, hard look at myself. What I could control. What I couldn’t. What I could choose to forgive. What I could choose to let go of.

And so, into my 40s, I forged, rebuilding myself, relearning how to have big, untamed, un-numbed emotions, about to find out who I was as a woman… not the work-hard, play-hard gal I’d been thus far.

8 years and 3 months on…I LOVE HER.

Fab phases of my 48th birthday

I’m going to smash through the rest of my reasons, as I have minimal creative capacity right now because I’m building a new business and teaching the 2026 timetable to new classes. (Private schools in Melbourne rotate the year groups early to give them a head start. So teachers have to bring New Year/post-holiday energy on a Monday morning in Week 7 of a 10-week term!)

I’m POOPED!

Reason number 2

has got to be the zero fucks given about dressing for an occasion. By that I mean dressing ‘appropriately’ for the time of day or event.

If I want to wear UGG trainers to a brunch, I do.

If I want to wear suspenders to work, I do.

If I want to wear ‘out out’ gear to the supermarket, I do.

If I want to wear head-to-toe red to a first date, I do.

You get the picture.

I’m usually the most underdressed or overdressed person in the room.

I buy things by texture, flamboyance, comfort and sex appeal. All because they make me feel fabulous.

Reason number 3

is my posse of women. God, they’re great. My family are on the other side of the world. I’ve been single for more years than I have fingers to count on. I am childfree. And I’m not alone or lonely.

Don’t get me wrong, I have my sulking on a Saturday with a pint of triple-choc-brownie ice-cream moments. I occasionally long for a cuddle from someone smelling of aftershave rather than Chanel No. 5…but on the whole, my women give me almost everything I need, including prolonged hugs.

They are my sisters from another mister. My ride-or-dies. They happen to live down the road. And the rest of them (are scattered across the globe, but are always there on the end of the phone and would fly to me - and vice-versa - in a heartbeat.

Reason 4

is the privilege of growing old at all. When you’ve lived long enough, and you’ve lived a life in some ropey places overseas, and in party circles, you’ve known people die before their time. Taken by accidents, overdoses, organ failure, and sometimes by their own hand. Or by cancer.

I am so deeply grateful to be here still. After some of the stunts I pulled when travelling, the lack of care for myself, the strangers I hung out with, the toxins I put in my body, and – looking at my life as a whole – the trauma I carried that did have me wondering ‘what’s the point?’ at times…it’s a miracle I made it.

So I celebrate my greying hair and the special sass an ‘older’ woman can emanate. I almost typed ‘sagging and wrinkles,’ but I’d be lying if I loved those. However, I don’t inject them or zap them. They’ll always win the race. I let them be.

And now we’re at the remaining – Reason 0.8.

This last one is hormones. Peri-menopausal hormones. They don’t get a full 1 as they’re the reason I have blackhead eruptions. But the rest of the side effects? I’m loving them. Many days, I’m full of energy like a teenager. I have the libido of Samantha from Sex and the City. My body shape has leaned out (weird). And I barely have periods - cheaper and convenient. Okay, reality check, I do hit the wall of tiredness, but I can’t tell the difference between PM and ADHD, so there’s nothing new to handle there.

Okay, my beauties. That’s my wrap on turning 48. I hope you take a moment to be grateful for all that you are when your birthday comes around.

You are way more fantastic than you think.

I see you!

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Time to get back to business. Literally, sitting in my bikini on the balcony at 6:45 pm, about to load a set of ads into Meta to sell more books.

If you haven’t checked it out…and you have a screen addiction…it could be for you.

Over and out until next time.

I love you.

Mwah 💋

If you’re interested in my new venture, here it is: The Connection Rebellion

Supporting parents and educators to ease their tweens and teens off screens for a healthy life.